To say this week has been a strain would be an understatement. Watching him prepare to move out.... to start a new life with out me. A life with another woman.
I promised myself I wouldn't cry.... I didn't cry.
He asked me if I would do his laundry...I said he'd have to pay me... he said he would. I said if he didn't I'd throw it all out. He said I wouldn't.
Last night I asked for the laundry money..... he laughed.
I took the clothes and threw them off the deck towards the fishpond. Since the cold had returned the pond was mostly frozen I emptied the ash bucket from the fireplace on top of them. Childish I know but it felt good!
Then I went to bed. No tears and no regrets.
Saying goodbye this morning was surreal and tear-less.
So now I'm alone and I feel ok.
I'll be ok!