Thursday, July 2, 2015

Second look on the 2nd ----Celia's Night Mare

This is the first time I've joined this meme. My MIL passed on Jan. 9th of 2011 
Dementia finally won out but we had lost her long before that day. 
Her birthday was June 15th and I always think about her a lot in June and when I saw this meme this morning this was the post I thought of first. 
I was still in the early stages of blogging then and mostly just wrote what was on my mind and heart at the time. With little forethought or planning. 
This post was full of emotions and feeling and fear. 

Celia's Night Mare

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Meet Celia--Living with Dementia

Celia Marie Samsel

Celia's Fight
"Anger rails at an uncontrollable beast .
A hideous worm eating away at her life force.
Stealing her memories and her ability to be rational
Leaving just enough to keep her confused and frightened.
Slowly taking everything she holds dear. "

Celia is my mother-in-law and has lived with us for 3 years now. She has dementia and is no longer able to care for herself. The last few months her disease has escalated and she is losing her fight to remain herself.
One of her few pleasures now is setting in the yard while I work. She sets and listens to the birds sing and dreams about a life that is fading away

She was always a feisty,very strong willed woman... not always so easy to get along with..but very sure of herself. I miss that woman as I watch her set and stare and cry about a life she can no longer control.
I miss the wonderful Italian meals that woman could cook and the recipes she was always going to share someday and never got around to it. She never wrote them down. Family recipes her mother brought from Italy.
I even miss those in your face arguments on on how to make a bed or wash a pot. She was the original "Mrs.. Clean" and loved her self proclaimed job of "Clean Police"

Once in awhile I still catch a sparkle in her eye that's a remnant of her old self . A fleeting flash soon lost.
For awhile I resented her constant presence and the loss of my own time and freedom. Now I fear that she will soon be leaving us forever and there is nothing I can do to stop it.
What will I do with out her to care for?
Who would have thought that a woman who hated me in the beginning would become so important to me in the end.
I love her and miss her already.

Thank You Elizabeth  for sponsoring this Meme.
You can check out the other post at ...
altered book lover

Tuesday, June 23, 2015

"T" Stands for Tuesday

Hello again my Tuesday friends. :) 
Well  I thought we were going to have a week of sunshine .....but I was wrong :( 
We had some sun yesterday and then it clouded over and rained again last night. Very cloudy today and looking like more rain is on it's way. 
I thought I would at least get some weeds pulled today...put it so wet that you just sink in the mud when you try to walk :( Believe me there are weeds that desperately need to be pulled and tomatoes that need to be tied up and pruned a lot! 
I planned on planting a late crop of green beans in the two rows on the right... grass and weeds are rapidly taking over. Hopefully I can get it hoed today or tomorrow and the beans planted. 

The Herbs all need harvest again and the last harvest hasn't dried yet. 

 ... the above is Lemon Balm to the back with Winter Savory in the lower right hand corner...
.... oregano was harvested last week while the granddaughters were here and it has already doubled in height again. 
The garlic is almost ready to dig. I dug one up yesterday to use for supper and it is so yummy. Fresh garlic is to die for :) 

I've been watching the birds at the feeders a lot this week. Something I do when I"m low on energy and fighting to gain control over the fibromyalgia. This weather has kicked my butt ....however I refuse to give up the fight. 
 The Hummingbird seems confused because I moved his feeder and put this one in it's regular spot. The squirrels have since totally destroyed this feeder :-( 

....but it didn't take him long to find his feeder. It's hard to get really clear shots because of all of the moisture on the windows :-( 

The Rose-Breasted Grosbeak have shown up finally. they don't always stay here but go farther north. We'll see if they stay.

Then the ever entertaining Titmouse. You can count on them being here all the time. 
The front flower beds are in full bloom... At least the perennials are. The annuals that are shorter and are usually in front chose not to grow this year :-( 

My drink this week is Gatorade....
Along with my SOC ( summer of color) 
art for the week...
colors for this week are 2 purples and 1 yellow. Had to throw in some green cause ya can't have a leafless poppy unless it covers the whole page. 

I figure I'll be outside in the heat pretty quick so it sound like a good choice for today.
Random Thoughts for Today...

So that's my Tuesday this week ...
Hope I haven't overloaded you with too many photos.... it's the only way anyone sees my gardens :) 
Don't forget to click on the button on my sidebar and visit the other Tuesday folks. 

Wednesday, June 17, 2015

"T" on Tuesday , Later on Wednesday

It's Wednesday and I'm very very late!!!!
It's been a crazy busy week here with the Granddaughters visiting and I just ran out of time. 
Today is more rain so it's an inside day with more free time for Grandma :) 

Kailey is entertaining us with a drum session :) 

Walking around the weeded area checking things out in the rain..

Checking out where the side road is washing away... must call the subdivision trustees and complain again. It's getting worse. 

 ...and then there is the garden...which so far is loving all of the rain :) 
 ...the peppers are growing fast...
 ...with lots of blooms and tiny peppers...
... tomatoes are doing great in the straw bales. are doing well...

....and fungi too..

So now we are off to town to buy tie dye supplies to make some night shirts and what ever else we decide on :) 
My drink of choice today is Vanilla Mountain to have the extra caffeine to keep up with these girls :)  
Today's Random Thoughts

   There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age. 

― Sophia Loren